I had a phone interview on Thursday and was told on Friday I hadn't made it to the next round. I was disappointed.
I think it's important to recognise that you can be disappointed about these things.
I wanted the job. They didn't think I was the right person for the job. I thought I was the right person for the job. It's a disappointment. Lots of people say "Their loss", "Not for you", "You'll find something better", which I don't find useful or reassuring.
It's not their loss, it's mine! I wanted that job. The job was for me... I don't want something better. These are all my first stroppy, still disappointed reactions to those comments.
I appreciate people's support but denying the disappointment and upset is not something I want to do.
I think children, particularly teenagers, do this a lot. They pretend not to try so if they fail it won't look like they're disappointed or upset. It's a risky strategy and avoids facing failure altogether.
In a previous school I worked a, a head of house used to be delighted when kids failed their driving test. For many, it was the first time they had properly failed something. They had tried, they had failed. There was no hiding from it. He'd see some of them get really upset and even cry. He wasn't laughing at them being upset. He was rejoicing that they had experienced real life failure. He felt that his school focused too much on achievements and winning. And 16 years old was too old to be failing.
When was the first time you remember failing at something? Not getting something you really wanted? Can you still taste the bitter tears of disappointment? Don't tell me you didn't get it and you're better off since then. Don't tell me you didn't want it in the first place. Share your first true failure.